Postcards To Myself (10 tough lessons)

Here are some tough lessons, I’ve had to learn(and perhaps still learning)

1. How to forgive and let go.

2. How to identify the smile of friendship versus the smile of deceit.

3. No one is “obligated” to love you back no matter how much you love them.

4. Accepting the apology you never got and perhaps never will.

5. Accept that some chapters will have to close without closure.

6. Acknowledging when it’s time to let go and move forward.

7. Moving on, like grief, is a process. A process, you have to allow to run its course.

8. Accept that people will be people, having different values, beliefs and morals. You can’t change that.

9. People are inherently selfish but you don’t have to be that way. Most things in life, boils down to choices. Choose kindness.

10. Life owes you nothing and the world continues to spin no matter what is happening. Nothing stops on account of you.

“Most things will be okay eventually, but not everything will be. Sometimes you’ll put up a good fight and lose. Sometimes you’ll hold on really hard and realise that there is no choice but to let go. Acceptance is a small, quiet room” – Cheryl Strand

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This thing called gratitude

Life has been good to me; not perfect, but good. For that, I am eternally grateful.
Through difficulties I’ve built resilience. I’ve seen the face of pain, so I redefined happy.
In my moments of loneliness, I redirect my energies into the things that will make me happy. Switch gears, change focus.

Continue reading “This thing called gratitude”

Journals and Things

Found one of many journals…I hesitated to open it because I knew exactly what was in it…chronicles of my pregnancy with Josh (I deliberately didn’t do it for Ben, understandably so, but sometimes I wish I had).

Also in that journal were my plans/goals outlined with details and budget for my move to Montego Bay from Kingston…(or maybe, I should say “our”, because I was married then 🙃) I mused on how very different life is now…well, when matched against those plans🙂

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Apology

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Let me apologize
For loving him and loosing you
For caring too much about him
When he didn’t care about me
For giving him the best of me
And all he did was take everything I had to give

Now he’s gone
Moved on with his past
The same past he lied about to me

So as I look into the mirror
At the beautiful but broken me
I apologize to the reflection
Staring back at me

From this day forward
I promise I will be
A little more thoughtful
Of the girl in the mirror
Who is depending on me

NAF
©2017

FADING 

His face glowed when he spoke to her
His eyes sparkled like diamonds
His smile, oh that smile can light up any room
His energy was contagious

His voice was like music
His words like poetry
She trusted them – she trusted him
Her heart smiled when he did

He made her feel like a fresh bloom in spring
He unearth feelings she had buried deep within
Forgotten feelings
He made her feel alive and beautiful again
He watered her soul

She was genuinely happy with him
Her days were brighter
She smiled for no reason
Thoughts of him made her blush

Continue reading “FADING “